You are Invited!

I received this invitation and was asked to pass it along...sounds fun, whatever.

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You're Invited to a PARTY to celebrate Bush's last day in office!  FINALLY!

DATE: January 20, 2009
TIME:  All Day
PLACE:  The Mean Bean Coffee House and Hemp Jewelry Emporium
ATTIRE:  Ponytails, Birkenstocks and bathing optional.

Please join us as we celebrate the end to eight long years of national embarrassment as we look forward to eight years of hope, change and our most merciful Messiah!

We're keeping it simple - because we all have so much to be thankful for.  But, to keep things moving, here's our rockin' agenda:

8:00 A.M. - Free coffee and the top-10 things we hate most about George W. Bush. 

9:00 A.M. - Discussions on Health Care.  An in-depth conversation on the nearly 50 million Americans who don't have health insurance and what George W. Bush HASN'T done about it.   

10:00 A.M. - Discussions on Foreign Policy.  We'll talk at length about all the rotten ways George W. Bush has screwed up American foreign policy.  Sandy Hustferth and her life partner, Mandy, will also be discussing their new "Adopt a Gitmo Detainee" program..."These poor men have gone through so much in their time in detention.  We, as a democratic, progressive people, owe them bigtime.  Mandy and I just wanted to open our home and do our part to give back."

11:00 A.M. - Progressive Theologian, Dr. Herbert James will present his newest book, "Dick Cheney:  Man or Satan?" You may recall his last book, "The Texas Antichrist and Other Prophecies Revealed," made it to #7 on moveon.org's Top Ten Book List.

12:00 P.M. - an organic vegan lunch with fair trade coffee.  There will also be a reading of Maya Angelou's greatest poems.

1 P.M. - Your favorite "Daily Show" clip-a-thon.  If there's been anything that has made the last eight years easier, it's been that island in a sea of insanity, that reason in an unreasonable world...The Daily Show.  Well, we've compiled some of the best Bush hatin', Bush is stupid, Bush can't talk, Bush can't walk, Bush is a Christian clips and put them in this magical hour to reminisce.  Those jokes never get old.

2 P.M. - "Where Do We Go From Here?'  As we all know by now, Bush is the stupidest human being ever born.  This introspective hour takes a look at the giant vacuum that will soon be created in the joke writing community when Bush leaves office.   Progressive comedian Paul Kantrell will walk us through the challenges they face as well as the new opportunities they'll find..."We're not too worried about it.  We'll rehash the old ones.  I'm already working on a monologue about how the Bush Presidential Library will contain the definitive collection of Dr. Seuss books."   

3 - 3:15 P.M. - Break for those needing medicinal marijuana  (Behind the shed out back).

3:15 - 4 P.M. - Organic snack break and nap time.

4 P.M. - "It's not Big, it's Phat"  A hopeful look towards the federal government in the Obama years.

5 - 7 P.M. - "Keep the Hate Alive."  In this provocative lecture, Dr. Seymour Finkelstein discusses the ways we can continue to direct our criticism, hate and blame towards George W. Bush.  Whether it healthcare, the economy, foreign policy - you name it - Bush is and will still be to blame - for nearly everything.   "The Bush legacy is going to be one that takes decades to erase," said Finkelstein.  "Things aren't going to stop being his fault because it's January 21..."

7 - 11:59 P.M. - "The Goodbye Bush Ball".  Ladies and gentlemen, ladies and ladies, gentlemen and gentlemen, dogs and cats, grab your life partner and get on that dance floor!  This is your night!  We've put together a playlist of your favorite Barbara Streisand, Elton John and K.C. and the Sunshine band hits.  Dance the night away - but don't forget the champagne toast to "kiss Bush goodbye" at 11:59!


Please note:  In an effort to reduce our carbon footprint, and since hybrids don't hold many people, we will be offering a rickshaw shuttle service provided at no charge by out of work Republican legislators.  Please help save the earth and take advantage of this sustainable mode of transportation.